« Herman Cain, the Republican affirmative action candidate | Main | Jon Huntsman's daughters are hot! »

October 11, 2011

Comments

I assume it's just the phenomenon that men everywhere are more willing to geek out on a subject than women are.

It this a humble brag way of telling us you'll be in Fortune?

[HS: This was a long time ago, and it's nothing to brag about. They were doing an article about losers who normally aren't qualified to be photographed.]

HS,

Why aren’t white male attracted to black women? Even black women that don’t fit the stereotype?


I ask because as a young African female, I find myself really attracted to white men but they seem to have no interest in having a long term relationship with me. I think I am fairly attractive and friendly atleast that is what I have been told by others. A lot of people tell me that I favor Naomi Campbell. My dream is to attend a top law school and marry a white male and subsequently have biracial children. Do you think that I should target older white men?

Women are generally better at relating to human subjects than the average man, however just like Clinton was better able to relate to people of both sexes than the average woman, the best men are able to both exceed the average women's ability, and are generally better at the intense study required to effectively capture a subject.

Yes, I thought it was just a roundabout way of bragging.

Anyway, in pretty much every field of endeavor the top people are men. Besides, I would guess that being a good wedding photographer requires confidence and assertiveness. And a confident and assertive girl can make a lot more money in pharamceutical sales.

It's a rather solitary profession at its core and more men than women prefer such work.

[HS: Portrait photography is not solitary, and that's the msot common type of professional photography.

Yes, landscape photography is solitary, but not many people actually do that for a living.]

A close friend I grew up with is a creative director for an action sports company and looks like a total creep. Short, kind of fat, huge beard, long hair. He pretty much looks a lot like Judah Friedlander, but not as attractive...

http://www.croatia.org/crown/content_images/2009/Judah_Friedlander.jpg

A few years ago I visited his studio and he showed me his photo collection which included nude and semi nude photo shoots of over 250 young women.
I was dumbfounded as to how he pulled this off. He then took me out and showed me how it's done. He basically just brings a big huge camera and walks around an area where there's going to be a bunch of hot chicks, like Santa Monica or Venice. Then he just taps on their shoulder, says he's a photographer and gives them his card. 4 out of 5 women he gives his card give him a call or send him an email! That's it! Nothing to it...

Related, I recently lived in Manhattan for 2 years and happened to see The Sartorialist in action. Although he is also quite short, he has the opposite look... well groomed, impeccably dressed. However, he uses the same approach. He carries a huge camera, and then just taps women on the shoulder and asks them if he can take their photo. They all oblige!

My conclusion from this sample set of two is:

- women WANT some guy to take their photo
- you either need to look very suave
- or you need to look kind of slobby-eccentric
- you need to carry a big pro looking camera around to seem legit
- being short helps, it must be non threatening

for what its worth, The Sartorialist seems to base himself at Ground Support coffee shop on west broadway. It seems a lot of model-looking women are always milling about in that area.

http://nymag.com/listings/restaurant/ground-support/

[HS: I used to work not far from there (which is SoHo), and I was just thinking how the building I worked in had some fashion photography studios and I often saw models going up the elevators. I miss that building.

Also, see my blog post about Manhattan's most pretentious sandwich (which is across the street from that coffee place):

http://www.halfsigma.com/2008/09/manhattans-most-pretentious-sandwich.html ]

D post a link to your dating profile.

D: From a white man's perspective the concern would be regression to the mean. You might not act like the stereotypical black person but perhaps our grandchildren would be.

That said there are tactics that you could use to counter that perception. Talking about your parents (and other family members) would be a good idea. Drop in the fact they they are still married, have good jobs, etc...

[HS: No one thinks about regression towards the mean except for people who read my blog. White men probably just figure a black woman wouldn't be interested in them.]

Seems to me if you're going to inquire into a male-female imbalance within any profession, it should be law. Did you ever notice that 95 out of 100 trial lawyers, i.e. lawyers who have to win to eat, are men? The plaintiff/defense dichotomy in litigation is the greatest risk-taking/risk-aversion dichotomy in any career field. Represent civil defendants=get paid regardless of result. And almost invariably flock to it. Imagine making $300K a year just going, "objection, overbroad!"

Seems to me if you're going to inquire into a male-female imbalance within any profession, it should be law. Did you ever notice that 95 out of 100 trial lawyers, i.e. lawyers who have to win to eat, are men? The plaintiff/defense dichotomy in litigation is the greatest risk-taking/risk-aversion dichotomy in any career field. Represent civil defendants=get paid regardless of result. And women almost invariably flock to it. Imagine making $300K a year just going, "objection, overbroad!"

[HS: Michelle Obama was making nearly $300K in a hospital administration job, plus she had extra income as the director of some corporation, so women don't have to do this kind of work to make that much money.]

D,
There are probably as many white guys into black women as there are white guys into asians or hispanic women.

Most white guys simply don't have the opportunity to meet a lot of black women (or any black women.) I've worked with two black woman my entire career.

My white friend is married to a black female lawyer, so it definitely can happen.

This is gonna sound super racist, so apologies in advance. Even though this blog is all about hating "NAMS", a lot of white guys secretly wouldn't mind having half black kids, because the kids would have a better chance at being cool and being better at sports.

I would never try photographing nude women because it would be far too depressing. Not because of what I would see, but because of what I would *not* see :(

D is an obvious troll. But it's still interesting that black girls generally trigger little or no sexual response in white men. This issue has been discussed endlessly in the blogosphere.

I've been thinking about it a while, and I think it's more than that they are simply less attractive than girls from other races. Somehow they cause a response of revulsion. Maybe they are triggering an avoidance instinct for homosexual behavior or inter-species copulation.


People (and animals) do think about regression to the mean, they just do it subconsciously. Different groups of people are adapted to different lifestyles, for example white middle class people have a certain way of doing things, whereas lower class black people have another way of doing things. A middle class white person who acts like a low class black person will have trouble in his society (ostracism), and a lower class black person who acts like a middle class white person will have trouble in his society (acting white, snitching).

Thus people will naturally want to make with people from their own situation, thus the kids will get a full complement of genes and memes that deal with that situation.

This manifests itself in "If I marry that black woman we'll have black kids, no one likes black kids, they're all trouble makers, what will everyone think?"

The same thing happens with animals. Let's say that a species of fish finds itself alone in a lake. It might diverge into two subspecies: one that stays near the surface, and another that lives in the deeper water. These fish will know to not mate with each other. The ones that do create children that aren't adapted as well to either niche.

So there will be both cultural and genetic forces urging people to avoid a long-term commitment to the "other". The only way around this is to show that you aren't the "other".

Yeah, pretty much sums it up.

But of course, some person will say something stupid like the glass ceiling and the boys club, or whatever.

I always wonder just how many guys are really aware of this, but don't speak out on it. A smaller percentage of women really know this stuff(or more accurately, know that they know this stuff) because of the rationalization hamster.

D, it's good to have you with us.

About strategies for convincing other people of HBD: maybe we can convince smart Blacks like D to spread the knowledge to Whites? I am sure they would be far more effective at it than us White racists. I would like to see the look on a liberal's face when a smart Black girl talks to him about racial differences in intelligence!

Wedding photographers are supposed to blend into the background as much as possible. Ideally, guests see them but don't notice them, that sort of distinction. Men can blend into the background, women cannot, and this may be part of the reason why men dominate the wedding business.

"Why aren’t white male attracted to black women? Even black women that don’t fit the stereotype?:"

It's mainly the broad features, big lips and bad hair.

Plus, what sane man wants a woman darker than he is?

@Ray Wilston, @T

Thanks for the comments, I really appreciate it. What do you guys suggest that I do? I have a mixed group of friends and I tend to hang out in places where there are a lot of white males. So far, I have dated two white guys on my campus. One for 2 months and the other about two weeks. Both seemed like they only wanted sex which of course I’m not ready for. Should I try to seek out older white males?

@TheEngineer- I would post my pic but I am a student body officer at my university. I would hate for someone to notice me and tell everyone that I read this blog (my school is filled with leftwing/Marxist liberals.

**For all of you racists fools making stupid comments you guys can go to hell. I have a pretty high IQ the same goes for my parents and siblings. Your passive aggressive comments are nasty and uncalled for!!!

The problem is spatial visualization ability. There's a known gender gap.

A camera maps a 3d scene onto a 2d plane. Different lenses affect the mapping in different ways.

Photograph a face from the wrong angle with the wrong lens and it will come out looking very odd. Limbs can look deformed or broken.

They also need to understand how lights will cast shadows.

You can be get steady work by learning rules about what works and what doesn't, but to get to the top you need to understand things from first principles.

Check out this part-black woman who actually believes in HBD and speaks out against blacks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWNIFDZ6PXM&feature=related

It takes some cojones to be a photographer. It's why you might get a lesbian photographer, but not a flamboyant male (except for a queer dominating field like modeling).

D,
I wouldn't call halfsigma a racist blog but it's definitely a place where racism is NOT considered a cardinal sin so you might consider developing a thicker skin.

Most of the commenters who appear racist are of the "insensitive" variety. They're probably the type who are willing to give a chance to Blacks who are assimilated and who choose the White or Western side.Only a few commenters like that sabril seem to harbor true visceral hate for blacks, no matter how assimilated.

About black female attractiveness, the empirical evidence seems pretty clear : Black women are not the favorites for the vast majority of people at least in the west, nowadays.
This doesn't mean to me that you have no hope at all. You'll just have to work harder at it than your average white girl.

I don't mean to condescend but start with the hair ! Get rid of any weaves and wigs ! Get a nice perm or a nice short hairstyle if that goes well with your face. You seem conservative so i won't suggest (clean)dreads or natural hair :) Though some men don't mind curves, you're much safer with being thin.

I know this is purely anecdotal but I have close relatives who are educated black women (not mixed race) and they haven't had any problem attracting white male mates(who are normal dudes, not dregs of their community). They're in Europe though. I hate sociology but a sociological explanation might be appropriate for once : The historical baggage between black women and white men in the USA is probably heavier than between black women and Euro white men. In the usa, the basic struggle has been White vs Black since the beginning, while in some euro countries the more important rivalry might be White vs Muslim or French vs Flemish, etc.

@ogunsiron-Yea I figure black women for the most part are viewed as unattractive.

@Camlost- Your right most men wouldn’t want to date a woman with darker skin than themself.

"...men dominate wedding photography"

Dude, what are you basing this on? That promotional site you linked to? Your half-baked assertion does not jibe with my personal observations.

"male photographers are often seen as creepy perverts who will masturbate to the images they capture"

I had not thought of this consciously when I chastised you for your surreptitious photography, but now that you point it out I don't feel the urge to argue.

I looked around for that Fortune article some years ago, and never found it.

FWIW in Europe I've noticed the following B/W couple trends. (warning: very anecdotal and limited data)

UK : almost always white woman (often a real heiffer) with a black guy

Everywhere else : Morelikely a black woman with a white guy (both more or less normal looking though the guy might look older). A few normal looking white women with black guys.

I have no idea if anyone has per country rates but a lot of WM/BW pairing seems French or German.

The PUA blogger Naughty Nomad is an Irish guy with a predilection for (African born) black women.

Black women are generally more masculin than any other race. To marry someone you need to offer more than your banging body. Cooking and cleaning may be part of it for some men; but it is also about raising your kids right, coming home to a sweet non-demanding face after work, worries about infidelity, worries about the ex boyfriend Jamaal still being around, and worries about STDs.

Almost 46% of black women have herpies after all.

Problem being that men are always better at the higher echelons of ANY endeavor. Cooking, photography, nursery, there's always a guy at the top. Women are just average. Check your bell curves.

About black pairings, I did see lots of WM/BW couples at Paris. It amazed me as I had thought that white men didnt like black women at all, as is usual.
I guess french women are just too bitchy and guys would rather have a daily blowjob. Blacks are more slutty after all.

D
One thing I've noticed is that in the US, blacks and whites tend to have different styles of flirting, and that the white male/black female pairs I've seen together tend to have some reason to have met (like a conservative church in common or a shared interest in an uncommon hobby).

D,

You shouldn't sweat it or what most of the commentors on this blog say. Men like women. The problems you're going through with men not wanting to commit, are not unique to black women.

I suspect that the more hateful commenters here are not very successful with women of any race. That could just be perception, though.

Men want someone who has a fairly strong sexuality without being a slore (slut-whore), can hold a conversation without blabbing and nagging, is reasonably attractive, but not enough to make her partner feel insecure about it, and likes a lot of the same things, but not all of the same things.

You should ignore the more superficial advice people are giving you here. Men will put up with a lot of 'weird' things about a woman if they find the above qualities.

Last question:
If the original post wasn't a troll post, why on earth would you think a sometimes-racist blog would a) be a good representation of the average white male for querying, and b) be a good place to get honest, constructive advice?

Folks mention greater masculinity in black women, which is sometimes related to a "Rushton's rule" that says blacks generally are more masculine than whites while asians are less so. It's often assumed that blacks have more testosterone, and I admit I thought that was the conventional wisdom. But apparently it just ain't so. There's a racist, anti-semitic but still very good blogger who goes by "n/a" and has a blog called "race/history/evolution notes". He cites lots of academic papers on things like anthropology, which included some that say there are no significant racial differences in testosterone America (though I think it also said estrogen is a bit higher among blacks) and among sub-saharan africans testosterone is actually lower. Readers can go to the racehist blogspot and search for testosterone (I have received complaints at other blogs for sending them incoming links and refrain from doing so here).

Going back to D girl's original question, relative darkness of the woman vs man could be an issue. Another thing I think applies generally in America is that blacks tend to have underclass traits, which now correlates with obesity. That's less likely to be the case with you as a college student. You could try dating sites, which not only sort people by preferences for things like inter-racial dating but also have a huge preponderance of men over women. The quality of men sending you responses may be the downside of the quantity though.

TGGP, n/a is being misleading with his information. Yes, it's true that T levels don't differ much between whites and blacks, but androgen receptor sites do. It's those receptors which play a bigger role in phenotypic expressions and behaviors like muscle tone and aggression.
I had it out once with n/a about this, and quoted him the relevant studies, but he dismissed them in anger.

Simple observation will bear this out. Go to any gym and look at the dudes who aren't on roids. The blacks almost to a man have less body fat and more toned muscles than the whites. That isn't cultural conditioning.

As for white male/black female dating... the crux of the matter is that, on average, black women are less attractive than white women. Blacks have heavier jawlines, broader noses and prognathic, jutting mouths, which are unfeminine, and probably a particular turn-off to white and asian men. None of those facial features are culturally conditioned either.

Note the critical qualifier "on average". There are plenty of hot, slim black women walking around. Maybe not as many per capita as women of other races (though I tend to find way more black women are attractive than short, sausagy amerindian women), but they do exist. So if D is one of these good-looking thin black women, she just needs to put herself out there more in the company of white men, avoid acting ghetto, and she will begin to see some action.

The comments to this entry are closed.