A quorum of kabbalists on Tuesday staged a secret prayer meant to land Mitt Romney win the White House.
The 10 ultra-religious men convened at Jerusalem's Ish Chayil yeshiva to open the Torah ark – a ritual saved for special occasions – and chant a series of invocations calling for divine intervention to "bring down" incumbent President Barack Obama.
For the sake of the exclusive ceremony, the Republican challenger, a Mormon, was dubbed "Moses Romney" with the suffix "Shlita," an honor usually granted to the most venerable of rabbis.
"This kind of prayer can turn worlds upside down," said Shmuel Ben-Atar, a haredi radio presenter who took part in the service. "We ask the people of Israel to pray that Obama – who doesn't like Israel – is brought down."
According to Ben-Attar, the formula that is certain to get Romney to win the presidency includes the repeated recitation of certain Psalms, a prayer for victory said over the open Torah ark – and giving a shekel to the needy.
"People called us from America and asked us to bring about heavenly mercy," he said. "People around the world will pray tonight for Moses Mitt Romney."
It’s too bad this didn’t work.